The nothing 90% (a note from the heart)
A few days ago, while doing my morning pages and organizing logistics and 'todo's, this thought dropped in:
"I could let go of 90% of it, and still have enough to be happy. What does that say about the 90%?
Nothing.
What does matter? The 10%, obviously. But also, that we're living. And sometimes (most of the time) striving for a goal helps us feel engaged, satisfied, and most importantly, alive."
I think the key part is the 'nothing'. It says NOTHING about the 90%. Neither good nor bad. Just because I could be happy with 10% doesn't mean I shouldn't work at the 90%, because striving can help us feel alive — and don't most of us want to feel alive?
The problem is that I invest a lot of my identity in the 90%. I tell myself something's wrong with me if it doesn't work out. The next thought in the journal had something to say about that:
The key is: what is at stake? When you already have enough then nothing is riding on it. When you don't have enough, then it's maybe your identity and worth that's at stake. Hell, I can make it about my worth even if I'm only trying to shave a few mins off my 5km race time.
So how do we nail the how? Lean into gratitude for all we have already. Then you realize you've always had enough and always will have enough. We just do it for FUN and that is reason enough.
Because if you're doing it all for fun anyway, then you've already won. This reflects a deeper truth — a throughline through in many of my recent emails:
- You don't need to change anything on the outside to feel better inside.
I've got this. You've got this. We've got this. 🧡💙
Love you.
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