"I just go out there, skate hard, give it 110%" 🏒
Ever hear that hockey player interview? Where the player who scored the winning goal says: "It was a team win. I just focused on going out there, doing my part, and giving it 110%. I couldn't be happier for the boys. We worked hard and it paid off tonight."
Of course you've heard it, because that's what most of the post-game interviews sound like.
But how well does that approach work in real life? 🤔
Do you ever have those days where you expect a lot of yourself? Where you expect to skate hard and give it 110%? Where you expect the win to follow?
I've had those days. Had one a few days ago. 😔
That 110% standard doesn't seem to work that well for real life. You see, it's hard to be that hockey player throughout the entire day. That hockey player probably only plays 22 minutes of that game. So not only is 22 minutes a lot less than a full day, it's also broken up by 38 minutes of play time sitting on the bench, not to mention breaks between periods.
So how are we supposed to run an entire day at 110% when even the pro is only doing 22 minutes? And most of us expect that of ourselves day after day. How the f### are we supposed to run our entire life like that?
Well, tell it to my subconscious, because it still expects me to put in that shift. Again and again. 🤷♂️
It usually doesn't go well.
There's a quote from Pema Chödrön that gives me a lot of comfort on days like that. It's a variation on the First Noble Truth of Buddhism which I learned in high school, which was "Life is suffering."
You see, I've always had a problem with "life is suffering." Not only does it feel bleak, I also don't think it's true. There's so much more to life! Playing with my boys when they're laughing and in a good mood is not suffering, it's glorious. Eating a hot, fresh slice of pizza is not suffering, it's sublime. Watching comedy with my wife is not suffering, it's delightful. That's all part of life too!
This is why Pema's version of that noble truth resonates so much more (I'm paraphrasing):
When life is hard, that doesn't mean anything is wrong. When you suffer, that doesn't mean anything is wrong.
There we go. Just because you're beating yourself up. That doesn't mean that there's anything wrong. Life is hard. And life is also way more than just suffering, though suffering is an integral part of it.
So when you have those days where you expect 110% of yourself for 12 hours during the day, know that it's okay. And when it hurts, know that that's okay too.
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