The Worst Advice I've Ever Received

Movember 2009, I was an articling student. So, a year or two before I received the advice in this post.

The worst advice I ever received came from a lawyer.

Although almost a decade ago, I was already an adult and into my career. You’d think I would have been old enough to see through it and not accept it for myself.

Guess not.

I was on a deal, and I did something that wasn’t ideal. I can’t remember what exactly - but it was minor and could be fixed. So I sent across a note to the other side saying “I’m sorry but… [blah blah]”

The partner gives me a call and says:

“Look Paul, a piece of advice - never apologize.”

Now this wasn’t about being a pitbull or adversarial, he still wanted me to be polite. This was about appearances.

And man do I have an issue with that. Trying to conform to this piece of advice was like trying to tie myself in knots. I might BE wrong, but I shouldn’t ADMIT I was wrong. I should do my best to appear perfect. So if I accept this advice (and I tried to), everything needs to be: i) private, or ii) perfect on the first go.

First, as you may be able to tell, that's NOT me. I willingly talk about failings - CURRENT failings, on my blog and podcast. I've always been open. Just because I have failures doesn't mean I'M a failure.

I've noticed when I'm afraid to share, there's often some shame of who I am kicking around.

Second, forget perfect on the first go. Hell, I’m not perfect ever. This is my 18th podcast episodes and I’ve never thought: “Perfect. This episode could not be improved.” I’m pretty much always thinking “This is useful, on brand, good enough, and it’s due right now. Ship it!”

The problem is that the advice stuck with me.

There’s data out there that shows that corporate cultures that allow their employees to be wrong are more innovative and creative, and much less toxic and shame-filled.

The mindset this advice spawned stifled my creativity and my willingness to take chances. It made me worried to hit send on emails.

If ANY of this sounds familiar, check out this episode of the podcast.

AND let me know what the worst advice you’ve ever received is. And from who.

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